Chasing Dubai

By Johnny Nghiem

January 6^th, 2017

A friend posted a series of questions on self-identity the other day and it really got me a bit bothered. I generally stray away from anything serious that's posted on social media but with almost two years logged into Dubai, I started to second guess my own identity and whether I've changed for the better or just simply adapted or nothing at all.

Most of my friends know how I feel about being here and long story short, it's very particular. One example is the notion of just being a person with a monetary value attached to them and another example is the sheer brutality of trying to associate with a culture that I clearly don't fit in.

It's not all bad though, if you look past the skyscrapers and gold plated Rolls Royces, there is culture, it's just an hour away.

Now, my idea of what culture is can be translated in various ways and one that I'm keen on is a type of energy that is thriving and feels authentic and I'm not talking about people yelling or fish being shoved in your face. I can't even explain it properly to be honest but with all the "charms" Dubai has to offer like free home delivery of anything (including just one bottle of water), the plethora of people rubbing shoulders and dirty floors and no air conditioning was a nice change of pace.

Hence, I finally made it out of the city centre and ended up at the Deira Fish Market.

Besides being able to actually catch the scent of the market 500 metres away, my nose is really not attracted to the smell of fish at all so this was a personal quest I guess.

It's strange to be at a place where the fishmongers were so ready for a picture and also so eager to ask me where I'm from in which many were shocked and maybe appalled that I wasn't from China, Japan, or Korea. There's not enough ni haos, konichawas, and anyoungs to ever entertain them with that lie even though their eyes wanted it so bad.

I'm usually not a squeamish person as I watched my grandmother kill many live chickens in our backyard when I was a kid but I was always on the verge of throwing up today. I just don't really get fish at all and having grown up with an allergy to it (now defeated) I never adapted to the smell or taste.

What do I get is seeing a stingray get gutted, that was super rad.

When I worked as a set designer in my previous life, I always wanted to design a market because you get to build the below. All these fruitmongers (?) need to work in film, that symmetry and colour coordination is so bang on.

Dubai seems to sometimes forget about the people who make the city run, keeps it fed, and loveable. Maybe this is my inner demon of not feeling appreciated ever and growing up in an immigrant family, so if you're ever here, don't let the LED lit buildings mask what really keeps the heart of the city beating.

Stairs.

On a personal note, I've felt incredibly alone as of late.

As much as I don't have the same enthusiasm about Dubai as I did when I first arrived, I will forever appreciate the people I met and the memories we created together. Never have I been to a secret Chinese restaurant in someone's apartment, never have I regrettably picked Comic Sans as a font for my co-worker to get a tattoo with, and never have I ever ordered just one bottle of water to my door until I moved here. All that right there is enough for me to know that my time here was worth it.

Through all my complaining about the food, the constant yelling "chune", and never being around as much anymore, I thank everyone I've met in Dubai for making it one insane adventure.